HOTU is part of a 501(c)3 non-profit organization.
Auditions
October 19-21 & 26-28, 2011
AVAILABLE ACTING ROLES
The Frank Cyrano Byfar Hour is a comedy/variety show in the style of Jack Benny and Fred Allen. The show features a cast of regulars, along with a house band, a jingle-singing trio and a cast of characters at the local chowder house.
NEW CHARACTERS
Reggie Vandersmoot
Male,
late 20s—early 30s
Voice Type: Baritone/Tenor
Reggie is husband to the Byfar Hour's Jenny Brennan. Together, they live next door to Frank and Amelia, and bring no end of neighborly cheer. Reg is of old Long Island money, and is very rich and very cheerful and very likeable and very stupid. He and Jenny make a perfect couple, and it's clear they're very much in love. (Jenny's clearly the one in charge, though she doesn't show it!) Reggie enjoys using his money to annoy Frank every week, coming up with a ludicrous addition to his house or holding disastrous social functions, but in the end he comes out likeable, like Bertie Wooster by way of East Egg.
P. Reardon
M or F,
late 40s—early 50s
Reardon is the Associate Something-or-Other Producer of the Byfar Hour. The job title is just a fancy way of saying "pain in the neck". Reardon is a constant visitor to the Cyrano's home, overseeing every minute detail of the program and scrutinizing every cent spent on production. A pompous, officious windbag of a middle manager who kisses up to Station Manager Howard Comstock at every chance possible, but whose ego is also easily deflated by Frank and Amelia at every chance possible. The casting is gender-neutral. Reardon could be a Mel Cooley from Dick Van Dyke type or the Mrs. Hathaway from Beverly Hillbillies type. Anything's possible in radio.
Chelmsford
Male,
80s—Death
Voice Type: Reedy, high register
Chelmsford is the elderly butler of the Adams/Cyrano household and is frequently heard puttering around with trays of glasses whether anybody wants something or not. He's been running on inertia for so long nobody knows what to do with him. While well-equipped with an ingrained butler's vocabulary, he often is heard simply muttering incomphrensibly as he goes about his business. As such, some of Chelmsford's muttered lines will include [Contextual dialogue in brackets]. This dialogue need not be mumbled verbatim.
A traditional telling of Washington Irving's 1820 tale, set in the Dutch country of upstate New York in 1790.
THE INN CAST
Ernst Kreitzer (M) [ERNST CRY-tzer]
This is a man that other men will follow. He is not an arrogant puddle of braggadocio. He's the real deal. He has a studied way of talking, as if considering every word. Which he likely is. Not a man with whom to trifle.
Ernst is a visitor to the inn, waiting out a storm. He serves as the narrator and the story is told from his point-of-view.
Funs Leidl (M) [FUNTZ LIE-del]
A middle aged, a rotund little man with no imagination, who married the perfect woman… for him, at least. He is generally jovial because he has little imagination and less ambition.
Funs is proprietor of the inn where the storytelling takes place.
Bente Leidl (F) [BENT-uh LIE-del]
A sharp woman in many ways, bright, shrewd, sarcastic, a dealer. But she loves her husband Funs, and even tolerates him pretty well. She is his age, or perhaps a little older, and is generally loved by people she likes, and hated by people who try to get things over on her.
Bente is the real brains behind the running of the inn.
Jacob ten Pas (M) [CHAY-cob ten PIES]
Remember the jolly burgher in the Vermeer paintings? That's Jacob. He's got the long pipe, the muttonchops, the florid face, the pending heart attack from overindulging. He's got a lot of money, but everyone who knows him is a friend. The kind of guy that you'd want to spend time with, even if he wasn't your boss, or buying the beer.
Jacob is part of the gang that regularly hangs out at Funs' inn.
Diederik Wassink (M) [DEE-drick VASS-ink]
In his late 20's. A born clerk, dotting i's and crossing t's for money. He's pretty good at it, and happy, but he will never be the life of any party.
Diederick is also part of the gang that regularly hangs out at Funs' inn.
Gerhard Kastien (M) [GER-hart KAS-tyen]
A gentle man, with pretensions to hip and with it. Middle aged, and somewhat resentful of not being young.
Gerhard is also part of the gang that regularly hangs out at Funs' inn.
Cobus Issel (M) [KO-bus ISS-el]
Middle aged, probably the brains of the outfit. Doesn't say much, but doesn't miss much, either.
Cobus is also part of the gang that regularly hangs out at Funs' inn.
THE TARRY TOWN CAST
Ichabod Crane (M) [ICK-a-bod CRANE]
A pernicious despoiler in a gangly frame, avariciousness coupled with arrogance, smeared liberally with unctuous sycophancy. A self-styled man of letters, arrogant of mien and awkward of bearing. A poet, as well, and a hymner and choirmaster.
Crane is a clever scoundrel with designs on the rich man's daughter and the money that comes with her.
Abraham 'Brom Bones' van Brunt (M) [von BROONT]
Brom has the potential to be a great man. Yeah, he's a jock, but he's also smarter than anybody around except Katrina, which is a good thing for both of them. A natural leader, daring and cunning when the need presses. As Kreitzer says of him, Brom is "every inch the hero".
Think Gaston from "Beauty and the Beast", but exactly the opposite in personality, skill and attitude.
Ad Damkot (M) [AD DIME-coat]
The perfect wingman, son of money, the guy you wouldn't mind your sister marrying. Which is pretty fortunate, considering.
Ad is Brom's best friend.
Katrina van Tassel (F) [ka-TREE-na von TASS-el]
The best-looking, nicest girl you ever met. Not yet twenty. Actually, not yet nineteen, but already head of a household, and doing it very well. She is a lot brighter than you would expect. And a lot tougher. She will be a formidable wife, all on her own. And dad's money won't change her a bit. Seriously.
Katrina is the daughter of Baltus van Tassel, the wealthiest man in town, and the object of both Crane's and Brom's eyes.
Margit Wevers (F) [mar-GEET VE-vers]
An elf of a pixie, around thirteen, and blossoming. She's sharp, quick and flirtatious.
Margit is Katrina's best friend.
Baltus van Tassel (M) [BALL-tus von TASS-el]
Rotund and cheerful. King Log instead of King Stork. A comfortable, happy man.
Baltus is by far the wealthiest man in the region.
VARIOUS TARRY TOWN FOLK (minor roles)
Cilla Nijenhuis (F) [SILL-ah NINE-hoos]
A dotty, elderly darling, with a knit wimple and twinkling eyes. Adores easily.
Cilla is Katrina's grandmother and Baltus' mother.
Drika van Brunt (F) [DREE-ka von BROONT]
Buxom, blonde, cheerful and somewhat placid.
Drika is Brom's sister.
Floris Kastien (M) [FLOR-is CASS-tyen]
A couple years younger than Brom and Ad, he is the kind of guy that's fast and tricky, albeit a straight shooter. Bad man to come up against in a knife fight.
Flors is part of Brom's cadre of hanger's-on.
Edwin ten Haken (M) [ED-win ten HAY-ken]
The archetypical friend, who will probably go into politics, have a long, storied career, and impact history, at least, locally.
Edwin is also part of Brom's cadre of hanger's-on.
Coos Boeijink (M) [KOOS BOW-ee-yeenk]
Young, slender, smart and intense. He's tough as nails.
Coos is also part of Brom's cadre of hanger's-on.
Daan Schreurs (M) [TAHN SHREY-ers]
Solid, even stolid, slow to… well, everything, but a man always to be counted on.
Daan is also part of Brom's cadre of hanger's-on.
Anke Rensink (F) [AHN-key REN-sink]
A professional bridesmaid, opinionated and a bit of a bitch, but pathologically faithful to her friends, of which she has many.
Anke is part of Katrina's close circle of friends.
Els Hasselink (F) [ELL HASS-el-ink]
Future mother of the year, except they won't have that until somebody publishes "Chatelaine" for the first time.
Els is also part of Katrina's close circle of friends.